I have always believed people change; all the time. Did I change? I am sure I did. Not that I noticed much of it till my plus two. It went unnoticed by me. The first time I observed something different was in my second year of engineering when my long time friends met and I just couldn't get to be myself among the group. It might be because of the different atmospheres everyone was in at that time but I could see the difference by a mile as in how suffocating it was. And when my school class teacher pointed out that I changed a lot since we last met. After that, I was conscious of the changes albeit inadvertently. There might be something about me that has been changed which I didn't know and still don't but I can say it would be in the minority because, if I didn't, there is always my grandma to point out everything and I believe her except for one when she says I have become thinner.
That’s impossible. Simply out of question!

But from last year something has been changed unconsciously. I just didn't know; that's until now.

I am averse to any kind of change that might happen to me or to anyone (anything) surrounding me in the past few months. I just want everything to continue to be as it is, not like the world being still for ever but something in similar lines with the earth rotating and everyone aging. Call it routine if you will. I like that. I dreaded to change the pattern of what I do on my weekends, what I do in the office, the way I work, the people I talk with, the channels I watch, the phone calls I make.. everything everything.. even the sleep. I was never like this. I am not saying I am not much of a sleep person but timing is a bit too much. Not that I was an outgoing person before but never this reluctant to change or meet people and talk to people. I previously used to say NO to almost everything only to say Yes a few seconds later. But now I just say NO to almost everything. Be it the extra work that my boss wants me to do or the weekend they want me work for support or the little amount of cricket, colleagues want to me to join in or the trip my roommate loves to go on or the new place to dine in or the idea of catching the new movie. Everything goes with a firm NO these days. Okay the movies might be exempted as everything is crap these days. But the rest... people stopped asking me now. And worst, I ould find reasons to say NO. Valid or invalid doesn't matter as long as I wanna say NO.

This wasn't like any other time where my grandma points out my abnormal behaviour or the change she saw in me and I laugh it off. Something new, that I recognized the hard way. For the first time in my life I missed home. I felt alone. For the first time I guess. Until now, I never missed home!!! Both my parents work and me living without them around me was not a seldom occurrence and I never missed them. I stayed for almost one and half year in the college not going home. I was never homesick. And I never felt alone. Ever! That wasn't me. So I thought but this time it was different. Something has changed.
I wanted to talk to someone so bad that I browsed through my phonebook only not to call anyone. Not even home. May be that’s what you get once you leave the comforts of the college. Not the bed, food and shelter but the other: Friends. I thought so. May be four years of stay after all made me feel like this. But no, not even that. I didn't want to go meet them even when I had a chance; chances if I tried a little hard. That is when I realised I kind of grew out of talking to others, caring for others in one way or the other (call it socialization?) and started living a lonely life some time back, of which I was completely unaware of. And I watched a season of desperate house wives!!!!! That should have been the final nail in the coffin but it wasn't.

I figure out, since my initial finding of changes associated with our lives, changes exist in life and phases too which fade out as quickly as they come or stay for a while lingering that extra moment to exasperate you. I really hope this is just a phase in my life. And not a sure shot change. That would be truly dreadful.

I got a call from the BSNL Engineer asking me whether I would be available at 11.30 AM tomorrow so that he could send someone to give us a new connection

After kicking myself to make sure it isn't a dream, I hurrahed only to see someone from the other project wondering what the hell happened to the silent guy!! I just can't believe it. I persisted them all these days calling each and every day only to hear some random reason and certain days, they wouldn't even answer the phone.May be the whole office is on leave. It can happen, I assure you. People told me to give it atleast three months. And they still insist not to count before the chickens hatch. But noone can stop me enjoying the moment they called. They called!!!

US TV Schedule:
http://www.zeesports.co.in/sports/TVTimes/tvtimes_us.aspx
Indian TV Schedule:
http://www.zeesports.co.in/sports/TVTimes/tvtimes.aspx

Last time I heard ZEE was an Indian Channel. Or is it, still?

Did anyone from the ZEE had an analysis done with an outcome that states: there is no need to update the schedules at this end of the world as no one would be looking at.Or is it because no one would question? or is it because the channel itself is shit not to mention the commentary team and they knew it.

I ached to watch the awesome gunners Carling cup team and I had to endure this shit. Anything for one more gem of a performance.

Long time indeed.

Delicious Treat It was Yesterday

That was a gem of a match. If if if if Federer's backhand, at any stage of the match, matched the same of his previous year it would have been another runners up trophy in Nadal's trophy cabinet and Borg's record would no be more. Alas it didn't.

And did I mention I hate it. I am no fan of Nadal but he is one of the best athletes I have ever seen. Federer would play an outrageous cross court short opening up the complete court and yet Nadal covers whole length of the pitch. Mind you even after 4 hours 40 minutes, he was doing the same. He would have played another three sets if asked to. Such is his stamina.

I am no astrologer but is this the end to Federer's era? May be. His forehand is of course out of this world and his serve is the best. 29 aces! But he is making lots and lots of unforced errors these days. His back hand isn't what it was. And when he faces Nadal, am I the only one who feels like there is a bit of mental pressure? Its sounds odd for a five time champion. I want him to comeback strong. Love to see him lifting the US Open trophy. Let us see.
The game is changing. I love Federer's game for his great technical ability but when its between Sampras and him its always the former. There is no serve and volley game in Federer's that I like. Now its Nadal who is much much much more reliant on the physical fitness than technical abilities and I hate that. May be that's the reason I cheered for Federer. Next time I would be rooting for Federer yet again. This time around I hope he doesn't get it wrong.

I waited for Borg's record to be broken and here I am not knowing how many years it might take. May be decades!

PS: I made a good decision not to watch the Asia cup as we made ourselves look like complete fools not chasing 273 on that pitch!!!! Mind you, on that pitch!!! Who ever is singing the name of mendis, I found his bowling way too normal and its the erratic shot selection by us that handed over the wickets and the win. So its 18 finals that we lost. No wonder there though.

Yesterday everything went wrong, I was talking about my predictions. I thought Kimmi would win, India would thrash SriLanka and arrogantly thought I would be pleased seeing Federer hammer Nadal.

When I look back at yesterday's events, I look like a total schmuck.
Hamilton dominated the race completing it almost 69 sec's ahead of others.
Jayasurya thrashed us.
Federer fought fought and fought only to loose the battle to a well deserving champion, Nadal: Take a bow!

Cricket now-a-days

Asia Cup pitches are a joke. And it’s schedule: pathetic.

What is with Danny Morrison and ‘Rhythm’?
What is with Wasim Akram and ‘whatsoever’?

A new punishment should be enforced: Commentary of Ramiz Raza, Ali Khan, Aamir Sohail, Arun Lal.
Dhoni was bowled by an off spinner but not by a doosra for God sake. Even after the replays, it’s the same comment: I expect way too much from Ramiz.

BCCI saying players should have opted out if they couldn’t cope with the schedule is the worst ever statement I heard in the recent years, may be not: they make statements every day.

Gunners Crashed out of Europe!

Absolutely gutted! I am. Seriously I am! How I wish the referees in the football games to be robots that will makes decisions with at least some precision and won’t make decisions based on the atmosphere surrounding them. How, how on earth can that be a fucking penalty!!!
Anyway, it had to be the gooners on the losing side. We are already told that, some may say, but I will say the better team just didn’t win. It didn’t. Not because they couldn’t but because of sheer injustice on the field. Simply they were outclassed by the officials letting Liverpool play with one another extra man. We could have tolerated that if he is a player but he is the decision making referee and even God cannot cope with that.